2017 Russian Grand Prix – Predicament Predictions!

[Rob Dylan]

Welcome to the 2017™ Formula™ 1™ VTB™ Russian™ Grand Prix™ – Predicament Predictions!

It's the most exciting race of the year - an event so exciting even Vladimir Putin takes the time out of his day to witness it. Find out who will be sitting beside the Russian president for the final 10 laps of the race when you tune in on Sunday, but for now it's time to start predicting! Bahrain saw nobody guess Bottas's first pole, and the guy's progress is likely (hopefully) to stir up the pecking order at the front. My predictions shall be:

1. Valtteri Bottas (every time until he does it)
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Sebastian Vettel
4. Daniel Ricciardo
5. Max Verstappen
6. Kimi Räikönnen
7. Felipe Massa
8. Lance Stroll
9. Carlos Sainz Jr.
10. Esteban Ocon

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Max Verstappen
First retirement: Fernando Alonso
ROTR: McLaren-Honda
IIDOTR: Lance Stroll
DBTMOTR: Daniil Kvyat
MLP: Lance Stroll
DNQ: Stoffel Vandoorne

Don't forget you can use your one-time double points any time you like

[Normal32]

2017 Grand Prix For Peace and Friendship of the United Soviet Socialist Republics

1. Kimi Raikkonen
2. Valterri Bottas
3. Sebastian Vettel
4. Carlos Sainz Jr.
5. Lance Stroll
6. Lewis Hamilton
7. Felipe Massa
8. Max Verstappen
9. Esteban Ocon
10. Pascal Wehrlein

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Kimi Raikkonen
First retirement: Marcus Ericsson
ROTR: Marcus Ericsson
IIDOTR: Lance Stroll
DBTMOTR: Daniil Kvyat
MLP: Lance Stroll
DNQ: Haas

[Ataxia]

2017 ENDUT! HOCH HECH! Grand Prix

1. Lewis Hamilton
2. Sebastian Vettel
3. Valtteri Bottas
4. Max Verstappen
5. Daniel Ricciardo
6. Kimi Raikkonen
7. Sergio Perez
8. Daniil Kvyat
9. Esteban Ocon
10. Lance Stroll

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Daniel Ricciardo
First retirement: Carlos Sainz Jr
ROTR: Renault
IIDOTR: Lance Stroll
DBTMOTR: Jolyon Palmer
MLP: Lance Stroll

[Enforcer]

2017 In Russia Grand Prix Watches You

1. Vettel
2. Hamilton
3. Verstappen
4. Bottas
5. Ricciardo
6. Raikkonen
7. Massa
8. Perez
9. Sainz
10. Kvyat

Pole: Vettel
Fastest Lap: Ricciardo
First Retirement: Vandoorne
RotR: Palmer
IIDotR: Alonso (yet again, he will make the McLaren look like an F1 car)
DBTMotR: Palmer
MLP: Stroll
DNQ: None

I'll use my double points now.

[CoopsII]

The 2017 Last Chance For Kvyat To Do Mother Russia Proud Before Putin Drags Him Off In Disgrace To A Gulag In Siberia Like He Did To Petrov....Grand Prix Of Russia

1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Ricciardo
4. Bottas
5. Verstappen
6. Räikönnen
7. Massa
8. Sainz
9. Ocon
10. Kvyat

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Räikönnen
First retirement: Stroll
ROTR: McLaren-Honda
IIDOTR: Alonso
DBTMOTR: Palmer
DNQ: Giovinazzi
MLP - I don't know what this is so I'll go for Johnny Dumfries

[AdrianBelmonte_]

2017 Not Ukrainian Grand Prix

1. Vettel
2. Hamilton
3. Verstappen
4. Bottas
5. Ricciardo
6. Massa
7. Perez
8. Hulkenberg
9. Sainz
10. Alonso (!!!)

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Raikkonen
First Retirement: Stroll
RotR: Palmer
IIDotR: Alonso (yet again, he will make the McLaren look like an F1 car, wait, i saw this already)
DBTMotR: Palmer
MLP: Ocon
DNQ: Julia Samoylova (wink, wink, punch in the balls)

[Aislabie]

2017 Crimean Memorial Grand Prix

1. Sebastian Vettel
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Valtteri Bottas
4. Kimi Raikkonen
5. Daniel Ricciardo
6. Max Verstappen
7. Felipe Massa
8. Sergio Perez
9. Fernando Alonso
10. Esteban Ocon

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
FLap: Kimi Raikkonen
Retirement: Daniil Kvyat
ROTR: Daniil Kvyat
IIDOTR: Fernando Alonso
DBTMOTR: Jolyon Palmer
MLP: Pascal Wehrlein

DOUBLE POINTS

[golic_2004]

1. Raikkonen
2. Ricciardo
3. Verstappen
4. Bottas
5. Perez
6. Grosjean
7. Ocon
8. Magnussen
9. Sainz
10. Wehrlein

Pole: Hamilton
FLap: Ricciardo
First Retirement: Hamilton/Vettel
ROTR: Kvyat
IIDOTR: Haas (first double points finish)
DBTMOTR: Kvyat
MLP: Wehrlein
DNQ: none

[This Could Be You]

2017 US Grand Prix

1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Bottas
4. Verstappen
5. Perez
6. Raikkonen
7. Sainz
8. Massa
9. Kvyat
10. Grosjean

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Hamilton
First Retirement: Vandoorne (if he starts...)
RoTR: Palmer
IIDoTR: Perez
DBToTR: Ricciardo
MLP: Stroll by default, as I'm still not sure Ocon counts, and Vandoorne'll DNF
DNQ: Not unless Mclaren have a really bad run

[Dexter249]

2017 Josef Stalin memorial Grand Prix.

1. Hamilton
2. Bottas
3. Vettel
4. Raikkonen
5 and 6 : Red Bulls
7. Massa
8. Stroll
9. Wehrlein (COME ON COME ON)
10. Hulkenberg

Pole : Hamilton
Fastest Lap : Hamilton
First Retirement : Both McHonda Big Mac's failing on the exact same lap.
ROTR : Fast Food Restaurant (McHonda)
IIDOTR : Stroll
DBTMOR : Grosjean
MLP : Stroll
DNQ : Big Mac Racing (McHonda)

[watka]

2017 Totally Democratic Grand Prix

1. Sebastian Vettel
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Max Verstappen
4. Daniel Ricciardo
5. Valtteri Bottas
6. Kimi Raikkonen
7. Sergio Perez
8. Nico Hulkenberg
9. Esteban Ocon
10. Felipe Massa

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Daniil Kvyat (somehow)
First retirement: Carlos Sainz Jr
ROTR: Haas (somehow)
IIDOTR: Red Bull, for genuinely challenging for the win
DBTMOTR: Jolyon Palmer
MLP: Esteban Ocon
DNQ: Nyet

[UncreativeUsername37]

2017 Ivanowski Memorial Grand Prix

1. Hamilton
2. Bottas
3. Vettel
4. Räikkönen
5. Verstappen
6. Ricciardo
7. Pérez
8. Massa
9. Hülkenberg
10. Ocon

Pole: Hamilton
FL: Bottas
First Ret: Alonso
ROTR: Stroll (crashes, but this time it's his fault!)
IIDOTR: Alonso
DBTMOTR: Vandoorne
MLP: Ocon
DNQ: ...

[Aguvazk]

2017 Ivan Drago Mother Russia GP

1. Vettel
2. Hamilton
3. Raikkonen
4. Bottas
5. Ricciardo
6. Hulkenberg
7. Sainz
8. Alonso
9. Pérez
10. Magnussen

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Vettel
1 retirement: Massa
Rotr: Ericsson
Deadbeat teammate: Ocon
IIOTR: Hulkenberg
Mlp: Stroll (11th, almost point finish)

[yannicksamlad]

The 2017 Despicable Me Tribute Grand Prix

1. Sebastian Vettel
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Valtteri Bottas
4. Kimi Räikönnen
5. Max Verstappen
6. Daniel Ricciardo
7. Felipe Massa
8. Esteban Ocon
9. Carlos Sainz Jr.
10.Checo Perez

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Kimi Raikonen
First retirement: Fernando Alonso
ROTR: McLaren-Honda
IIDOTR: Esteban Ocon
DBTMOTR: Jolyon Palmer
MLP: Esteban Ocon
DNQ:

[Peteroli34]

1. Sebastian Vettel
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Valteri Bottas
4. Max Verstappen
5. Daniel Riccardo
6. Kimi Räikönnen
7. Sergio Perez
8. Felipe Massa
9. Carlos Sainz Jr.
10. Esteban Ocon

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Lewis Hamilton
First retirement: Stoffel Vandoorne
ROTR: Danil Kyvat
IIDOTR: Pascal Wehrlien
DBTMOTR: Jolyn Palmer
MLP: Esteban Ocon
DNQ:

[dr-baker]

2017 "Off to the gulag if you don't let Petrov and Kvyat score a 1-2" Grand Prix of the great and glorious dictatorship of His Royal Highness Sir Prince Vladimir Putin

1. Lewis Hamilton
2. Sebastian Vettel
3. Valteri Bottas
4. Kimi Raikkonen
5. Daniel Ricciardo
6. Max Verstappen
7. Felipe Massa
8. Sergio Perez
9. Nico Hulkenberg
10. Romain Grosjean

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Lewis Hamilton
First retirement: Fernando Alonso
ROTR: Honda
IIDOTR: Pascal Wehrlein
DBTMOTR: Jolyn Palmer
MLP: Lance Stroll
DNQ: a McLaren. Vandoorne?

[tommykl]

2017 Tommy's Dissertation Hand-In Special Grand Prix

1. Sebastian Vettel
2. Kimi Räikkönen
3. Lewis Hamilton
4. Daniel Ricciardo
5. Sergio Pérez
6. Valtteri Bottas
7. Felipe Massa
8. Max Verstappen
9. Lance Stroll
10. Romain Grosjean

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Kimi Räikkönen
First retirement: Carlos Sainz
ROTR: Honda
IIDOTR: Lance Stroll
DBTMOTR: Esteban Ocon
MLP: Lance Stroll
DNQ: None

[Dj_bereta]

1. Hamilton
2. Bottas
3. Vettel
4. Räikönnen
5. Ricciardo
6. Verstappen
7. Massa
8. Perez
9. Hulkenberg
10. Stroll

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Hamilton
First retirement: Vandoorne
ROTR: Palmer
IIDOTR: Stroll
DBTMOTR: Palmer
MLP: Strol
DNQ: 0

[mario]

1. Vettel
2. Hamilton
3. Raikkonen
4. Bottas
5. Verstappen
6. Ricciardo
7. Massa
8. Perez
9. Esteban Ocon
10. Hulkenberg

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Raikkonen
First retirement: Stroll
ROTR: Honda
IIDOTR: Ocon
DBTMOTR: Palmer
MLP: Ocon
DNQ: None (though with Vandoorne's repeated mechanical problems, I wouldn't be surprised if he did fail to set a time in qualifying)

[RAK]

2017 "Yet Another Kleptocratic Petrostate, Except This Time In Europe" Grand Prix

1) Vettel
2) Hamilton
3) Raikkonen
4) Bottas
5) Ricciardo
6) Verstappen
7) Massa
8) Perez
9) Hulkenberg
10) Magnussen

Pole: Vettel
Fastest Lap: Raikkonen
First Retirement: Vandoorne
ROTR: Ericsson
IIDOTR: Palmer
DBTMOTR: Stroll
MLP: Ocon
DNQ: None

[Miguel98]

2017 Putin Grand Prix

1) Vettel
2) Bottas
3) Hamilton
4) Raikkonen
5) Ricciardo
6) Verstappen
7) Massa
8) Perez
9) Hulkenberg
10) Ocon

Pole: Bottas
Fastest Lap: Raikkonen
First Retirement: Vandoorne
ROTR: Stroll
IIDOTR: Hulkenberg
DBTMOTR: Palmer
MLP: Ocon
DNQ: Vandoorne

[CarloSpace]

1. Lewis Hamilton
2. Valtteri Bottas
3. Sebastien Vettel
4. Kimi Räikkönen
5. Max Verstappen
6. Daniel Ricciardo
7. Carlos Sainz Jr.
8. Nico Hülkenberg
9. Felipe Massa
10. Lance Stroll

Pole: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Valtteri Bottas
First retirement: Stoffel Vandoorne
ROTR: Daniil Kvjat
IIDOTR: Carlos Sainz Jr.
DBTMOTR: Daniil Kvjat
MLP: Lance Stroll

[pi314159]

1. VET
2. RAI
3. HAM
4. BOT
5. RIC
6. MAS
7. VER
8. HUL
9. PER
10. MAG

Pole: VET
Fastest lap: VET
First retirement: VAN
ROTR: STR
IIDOTR: MAS
DBTMOTR: STR
MLP: OCO

[Rob Dylan]

Now that everything has been counted up, I can announce that Enforcer has won - with a little help from double points - with a solid 26 points after the Russian Grand Prix! The scores are as follows:

1 Enforcer 26*
2 Aislabie 18*
3 AdrianBelmonte_ 15
= mario 15
= RAK 15
6 This Could Be You 14
7 Rob Dylan 13
= yannicksamlad 13
= pi314159 13
10 CoopsII 12
= watka 12
= Ugncreativeusergname 12
= Miguel98 12
14 peteroli34 11
= CarloSpace 11
16 dr-baker 10
17 Normal32 9
= Ataxia 9
= Aguvazk 9
20 tommykl 8
= Dj_bereta 8
22 golic_2004 7
= Dexter249 7
*used double points

Aislabie, the championship leader, also used his double points to good effect, earning a solid 18 points to keep himself in the lead. I gave This Could Be You the bonus point for best race title, but it was a strong competition this weekend. Therefore the standings are as follows:

1 Aislabie 74
2 Mario 71
3 CarloSpace 64
4 Watka 62
5 Enforcer 58
6 Tommykl 57
7 UgncreativeUsergname 55
8 AdrianBelmonte_ 54
9 Rob Dylan 52
10 CoopsII 51
11 dr-baker 50
12 pi314159 47
13 Yannicksamlad 42
14 Dj_bereta 40
15 This Could Be You 38
16 takagi_for_the_win 37
17 Ataxia 35
18 Miguel98 35
19 Normal32 34
20 RAK 33
21 mash 28
22 Pasta_Maldonado 26
23 Aguvazk 25
24 peteroli34 25
25 Andrew 16
26 FullMetalJack 15
27 Dexter249 14
28 Dartanian 12
29 RedEyes504 12
30 DemocalypseNow 11
31 golic_2004 7

Aislabie opens up a three-point lead in the championship, but the consistent Mario is still not far behind - nor have they used their double points yet. Enforcer's win was the highest points score of the 2017 season so far, and all is still to play for in the remaining 16 rounds of this intense championship