Grand Prix Rejects

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the Azerbaijan Predicament Predictions Round 4 in Azerbaijan in 2018!

I'm a few days late in posting this, so let's get started, shall we?

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Pole Position:
Fastest lap:
First retirement:
Reject of the Race:
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race:
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race:
Minor League Premiership:
Did not Start:

This week's candidates for Minor League Premiership are: Leclerc; Hartley; Gasly; Sirotkin. And don't forget that you can use your double points whenever, for one race only. Make it a good one if you do!

My predictions are:

1. Max Verstappen (what a twist!)
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Sebastian Vettel
4. Daniel Ricciardo
5. Fernando Alonso
6. Kevin Magnussen
7. Romain Grosjean
8. Stoffel Vandoorne
9. Carlos Sainz Jr.
10. Sergio Pérez

Pole Position: Sebastian Vettel
Fastest lap: Sebastian Vettel
First retirement: Pierre Gasly
Reject of the Race: Kimi Raikkonen
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Max Verstappen
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Valtteri Bottas
Minor League Premiership: Sergey Sirotkin
Did not Start: Brendon Hartley

2018 Nasim Najafi Agdam Grand Prix

1. Pierre Gasly
2. Romain Grosjean
3. Valtteri Bottas
4. Brendon Hartley
5. Carlos Sainz Jr.
6. Kevin Magnussen
7. Sergio Perez
8. Esteban Ocon
9. Marcus Ericsson
10. Lance Stroll

Pole Position: Sebastian Vettel
Fastest lap: Valtterri Bottas
First retirement: Lewis Hamilton
Reject of the Race: Lewis Hamilton
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Pierre Gasly
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Lewis Hamilton
Minor League Premiership: Pierre Gasly
Did not Start: N/A

2018 Not Petrol Ofisi Turkish Grand Prix

1. Lewis Hamilton (Hammy pls)
2. Kimi Raikkonen
3. Daniel Ricciardo
4. Valtteri Bottas
5. Kevin Magnussen
6. Nico Hulkenberg
7. Fernando Alonso
8. Sergio Perez
9. Carlos Sainz
10. Stoffel Vandoorne

Pole Position: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Kimi Raikkonen
First retirement: Romain Grosjean
Reject of the Race: Sebastian Vettel/Max Verstappen
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Kevin Magnussen?
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Romain Grosjean
Minor League Premiership: Pierre Gasly
Did not Start: None

I'm Behind And I Feel Like Everyone Will Be Guessing Ferrari So I'm Going For A Contra Strategy GP

1. Hamilton
2. Bottas
3. Vettel
4. Räikkönen
5. Verstappen
6. Ricciardo
7. Hülkenberg
8. Alonso
9. Magnussen
10. Sainz

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Hamilton
First retirement: Gasly
Reject of the Race: Gasly
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Ericsson
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Grosjean
Minor League Premiership: Gasly
Did not Start: ...

2018 Salaam slalom GP

1. Hamilton
2. Verstappen
3. Vettel
4. Raikkonnen
5. Ricciardo
6. Bottas
7. Hulkenberg
8. Perez
9. Ocon
10. Sainz

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Raikkonen
First retirement: Hartley
Reject of the Race: Hartley
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Leclerc
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Hartley
Minor League Premiership: Leclerc
Did not Start: Ericsson

2018 Lance Stroll Memorial Grand Prix

DOUBLE POINTS

1. Sebastian Vettel
2. Lewis Hamilton
3. Daniel Ricciardo
4. Fernando Alonso
5. Max Verstappen
6. Kevin Magnussen
7. Nico Hulkenberg
8. Romain Grosjean
9. Esteban Ocon
10. Stoffel Vandoorne

Pole: Sebastian Vettel
FLap: Max Verstappen
Retirement: Raikkonen and Bottas, first lap clash
ROTR: Max Verstappen
IIDOTR: Fernando Alonso
DBTMOTR: Kimi Raikkonen
MLP: Brendon Hartley
DNS: None

I've taken a massive gamble on the double points for this race, but if it pays off then that'd be grand.

1. Bottas
2. Verstappen
3. Hamilton
4. Magnussen
5. Raikkonnen
6. Ricciardo
7. Hulkenberg
8. Ericsson
9. Leclerc
10. Ocon

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Raikkonen
First retirement: Vandoorne
Reject of the Race: McLaren (potential podium for Alonso goes to waste with a wheel making a run for the border)
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Sauber
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Grosjean
Minor League Premiership: Leclerc
Did not Start: Gasly

2018 Former USSR nation of Azerbaijan Grand Prix

1. Lewisham
2. Raikkonen
3. Vettel
4. Bottas
5. Ricciardo
6. Magnussen
7. Alonso
8. Sainz
9. Grosjean
10. Perez

Pole Position: Lewisham
Fastest lap: Bottas
First retirement: Hartley
Reject of the Race: Vettel
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Raikkonen
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Sirotkin
Minor League Premiership: Gasly
Did not Start: nobody

2018 Lowest Altitude Grand Prix
1. Bottas
2. Vettel
3. Hamilton
4. Grosjean
5. Ricciardo
6. Magnussen
7. Sainz
8. Leclerc
9. Pérez
10. Sirotkin

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Grosjean
First retirement: Räikkönen/Verstappen (first corner accident)
Reject of the Race: McLaren
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Sirotkin
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Hülkenberg
Minor League Premiership: Leclerc
Did not Start: nope

2018 "I can't believe it's not Asia!" Grand Prix

1. Hamilton
2. Vettel
3. Raikkonen
4. Stroll
5. Ricciardo
6. Verstappen
7. Ocon
8. Bottas
9. Vandoorne
10. Pérez

Because I tend to overthink it, I just typed out the top ten in the order I remembered drivers' names

Pole Position: Hamilton
Fastest lap: Bottas
First retirement: Gasly
Reject of the Race: RobDylan as the first victim of the workers' revolution (why did you think they made you a mod?)
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Captain Hammer, aka PrisonerMonkeys, aka Kapitan Molot i Serp, leader of the aforementioned revolution
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Sirotkin, I guess, looking at what I wrote above
Minor League Premiership: Also Sirotkin. He was the first rookie I thought of (finished 12th behind Hulkenberg)
Did not Start: Well, let's not get too pessimistic...

2018 It's Not Like I Like You Or Anything, B-Baku Grand Prix

1. Max Verstappen
2. Sebastian Vettel
3. Lewis Hamilton
4. Valtteri Bottas
5. Kimi Räikkönen
6. Romain Grosjean
7. Nico Hülkenberg
8. Kevin Magnussen
9. Sergey Sirotkin
10. Brendon Hartley

Pole Position: Lewis Hamilton
Fastest lap: Sebastian Vettel
First retirement: Stoffel Vandoorne
Reject of the Race: McLaren-Renault
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Sergey Sirotkin
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Carlos Sainz, Jr.
Minor League Premiership: Sergey Sirotkin
Did not Start: Fernando Alonso

2018 We Have a Three-Way Title Fight Here Lads Grand Prix

1. Ricciardo
2. Hamilton
3. Verstappen
4. Vettel
5. Raikkonen
6. Bottas
7. Alonso
8. Hulkenberg
9. Gasly
10. Sainz

Pole: Verstappen
Fastest Lap: Verstappen. No particular scenario for Verstappen fastest, but not winning envisioned here, btw, I'm just trying spread my betting across both Red Bulls
First retirement: Leclerc
Reject of the Race: Force India
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Alonso
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Vandoorne
Minor League Premiership: Hartley

The "now that I don't pick him for pole and victory, Hamlton will probably win from lights to flag" race.

1. Vettel
2. Ricciardo
3. Bottas
4. Hamilton
5. Räikkönen
6. Verstappen
7. Ocon
8. Magnussen
9. Hulkenberg
10. Perez

Pole Position: Vettel
Fastest lap: Ricciardo
First retirement: Vandoorne
Reject of the Race: Vandoorne
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Ocon
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Vandoorne
Minor League Premiership: Gasly
Did not Start: None

The "I cross my heart, I tear down the firewalls, I cross my heart, I'm stronger than cannonballs" Grand Prix.

1. Ricciardo
2. Bottas
3. Alonso
4. Hamilton
5. Räikkönen
6. Sainz
7. Ocon
8. Grosjean
9. Ericsson
10. Stroll

Pole Position: Vettel
Fastest lap: Raikkonen
First retirement: Sirotkin
Reject of the Race: Vandoorne
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Alonso
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Vandoorne
Minor League Premiership: Gasly
Did not Start: None


Ye, i think it's gonna be a crazy race

2018 Lance Stroll Podium Memorial Trophy

1. HAM
2. VET
3. RIC
4. VER
5. RAI
6. MAG
7. HUL
8. SAI
9. OCO
10. PER
Pole: Bottas
F. Lap: Hamilton
1st Retirement: Ericsson
RoTR: Mclaren (too slow down the straights= PNowhere)
IIDoTR: Magnussen
MLP: Sirotkin (by virtue of finishing, nothing else)
DNS: Stroll

2018 "How not to order your steak" Grand Prix

1) Hamilton
2) Vettel
3) Ricciardo
4) Raikkonen
5) Bottas
6) Verstappen
7) Ocon
8) Magnussen
9) Hulkenberg
10) Alonso

Pole: Hamilton
Fastest Lap: Ricciardo
First Retirement: Leclerc
ROTR: Vandoorne
IIDOTR: Sirotkin
DBTMOTR: Grosjean
MLP: Gasly
DNS: None

2018 Monaco with a castle GP

1. Vettel
2. Ricciardo
3. Raikkonen
4. Hamilton
5. Bottas
6. Hulkenberg
7. Alonso
8. Perez
9. Sainz
10. Magnussen
Pole: Vettel
F. Lap: Ricciardo
1st Retirement: Verstappen
RoTR: i dont know, something in the interview
IIDoTR: Perez
MLP: Gasly
DNS: Nadie

1. Räikkönen
2. Ricciardo
3. Vettel
4. Bottas
5. Hülkenberg
6. Alonso
7. Sainz Jr.
8. Gasly
9. Ocon
10. Vandoorne

Pole Position: Räikkönen
Fastest lap: Ricciardo
First retirement: Verstappen
Reject of the Race: Verstappen
Infinite Improbability Drive of the Race: Alonso
Deadbeat Teammate of the Race: Hamilton
Minor League Premiership: Gasly
Did not Start: Magnussen

Much more on time for Baku, we have the results for the Azerbaijani Predicament Predictions championship. And we have our fourth winner in four races! dr-baker takes his first win of the season *fanfare*, getting consistent results in what was certainly an unexpected set of finishes. There were a lot of drivers missed out on, primarily Pérez's shock podium, and Leclerc's shock-ier sixth place. Here are the results of the race below:

Results
1. dr-baker 14
2. yannicksamlad 13
3. Gertrand Bachot 12
- Aislabie 12**
5. Simtek 10
6. Normal32 9
- Ugncreativeusergname 9
- AdrianBelmonte_ 9
- This Could Be You 9
- Aguvazk 9
11. Rob Dylan 8
- RAK 8
13. Enforcer 7
- mario 7*
15. tommykl 6
- Klon 6
- CarloSpace 6
18. Wizzie 4
*funniest alternative race title
**used double-points

Therefore, Lewis Hamilton's win managed to get many participants at least some points in what was a very low-scoring round. RAK therefore still leads the championship, but his lead is a sliver ahead of Aguvazk. Our early championship leader Klon slips down the standings a little further, whilst Aislabie's double points were not used to their best effect to throw him up the championship. Drivers this year appear to be being more conservative with their double points, while those who have used it (namely me and one other ) haven't had much luck! The standings after four rounds are below:


Standings
1 RAK 52
2 Aguvazk 51
3 Gertrand Bachot 46
4 Klon 45
5 Enforcer 45
6 dr-baker 43
7 mario 42
8 tommykl 40
9 Rob Dylan 40
10 Ugncreativeusergname 39
11 This Could Be You 39
12 Aislabie 36
13 CarloSpace 34
14 AdrianBelmonte_ 33
15 Wizzie 32
16 yannicksamlad 24
17 Bleu 22
18 Normal32 20
19 Collieafc 17
20 Dexter249 12.5
21 mash 12
22 Simtek 10
23 pasta_maldonado 9
24 IceG 8
- The Flying Caterham 8

See you next time in Spain!

Another race where I wish I had used double-points! Gah! Still, a win's a win...