The Al Pease Memorial Half-Marathon

[dinizintheoven]

I am going to do something quite, quite mad.

A while back (mid-January) I heard of a charity run in aid of the Miscarriage Association, called the Angel Run. Now, I loathe and detest running even more than our new Scotalian overlord hates Rubentus - in fact, there's far more chance of seeing him wearing a black and white football strip from Turin than there is of me ever volunteering for any kind of run. But I saw the Angel Run was a "virtual race" - you can run at your own pace, on any route, even on a treadmill. And this somehow drew me in. What if I were to enter, but refuse to run, and walk it instead? The idea was further reinforced a couple of weeks ago when I missed the last bus home and decided to walk from Derby to Nottingham - 14 miles, I'm told that is - and got as far as the A52 sliproad to Spondon, still within the locale of Derby, before the police objected and picked me up for a ride home.

But I'm a stubborn old goat and I refuse to be defeated on this one. I was determined to get my way, and so I've signed up for the Angel Run. And I will not be running a single yard. I will follow all their rules, I should have my time posted on their official board, and I will not be beating the current fastest time (1h34m47s) - nor will I be beating the slowest time (3h17m01s). In fact, Google Maps tells me my route for 13.1 miles will take 4 hours and 23 minutes.

Even though this is all about miscarriages, I have decided to dedicate my efforts to the late Al Pease, reject hero of the 1967 Canadian Grand Prix. I will be finishing even further off the pace than he did that day.

I set off at 8:00 on the dot tomorrow morning. My not-a-run starts at my front door, heads down the A52, snakes through Wilford and West Bridgford for a bit, rejoins the A52, then heads down the A606 through Tollerton, Stanton-on-the-Wolds, Hickling Pastures and Upper Broughton, crosses the border into Leicestershire and finishes at the Anchor in Nether Broughton. There I will find a couple of fine ales and a Sunday roast, rather than a plastic bottle of Lucozade Sport and a couple of lettuce leaves. That's the way I like to live.

I am the wrong side of 35, I am packing 15 stone of pure lard and I despise any form of vigorous exercise. But this is something I can get behind, and I can celebrate the world of (as we now have to call it) Grand Prix Rejectdom at the same time.

[dr-baker]

This sounds suitably rejectful. You're already doing better than either Life or Mastercard Lola by being qualified to take the start. 200 yards in, you'll have done better than Marco Apicella. And by finishing, you'll have done more than Roberto Moreno at the 1992 Monaco Grand Prix in the Andrea Moda!

[watka]

GO JIM! Hope you have a great time and a rewarding ale to finish!

[dinizintheoven]

That was a pleasant morning in the sun, all things considered. It seems 13 (point 1) miles isn't quite as arduous as I remember from hauling myself round Skaftafell five and a half years ago. But both epic voyages did end with beer - though today's rewards were a bit more than just one can of Viking Gylltur. It involved three pints of Ringwood Best, a full roast dinner, apple crumble... and the full appreciation of the landlady of the Anchor, who told me she'd once had a miscarriage herself and knew exactly what that was like. And only when I was in the pub at the other end did it see fit to rain.

Final time - four hours, seven minutes, which is more than twice the time of Andie Ford at the top of the list (whose time was 1h37min). So, I definitely finished behind where Al Pease did in 1967. I managed to weave that into the tour documentary with both a heavy plug for the all-new GP Rejects and my own video series that involved a stroll round Darlington...

[tommykl]

We demand to see the video!

[tristan1117]

Darn, I wish I looked at this earlier before the deadline for registration! Unlike dinizintheoven, I'm an avid distance runner and probably could've topped the 5K, 10K, and half-marathon leaderboards, but alas, that ship has sailed. Would love to see this video!

[dinizintheoven]

We demand to see the video!

Patience, Thomas. I'm still editing it, and the filming won't be complete until Thursday... for reasons which I won't reveal yet.

[dinizintheoven]

We demand to see the video!

And now you can.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RfmD7xS-mIk

I need not tell anyone on this forum about Al Pease, but if you want to know why I did what I did when I hate running, I told that story - as well as that of someone who meant I had absolutely no excuse not to do this. You'll also discover a hidden talent I have (admittedly very limited) that many people who know me were not aware of, you'll discover the wonderful (and completely free) music of Appalachian Winter, and you can learn Finnish!

I could, if I wanted, have another attempt to beat my official time - but yesterday, I had major surgery and I am now minus gall bladder. The rest of this month will probably be spent recovering from the hacking and slicing and internal bleeding, and a long walk is now not what I want to be doing - hence why I did this last weekend.

But I'm proud to sit at the bottom of the half marathon times!